"I am whatever you say I am, if I wasn't then why would I say I am"
Cutting, poking, fucking, sleeping, fingering, piercing, drinking, smoking, dying, licking, crying, hitting, banging, fighting, hiding, faking, talking, crapping, shaking, ironing, peeing, emptying, jumping, vomiting
I ask myself what the hell am I doing and I can't find an answer stop blaming others not treating you right you don't even know how to treat yourself right
Use others for the falsifying feelings of cloudiness
We surround each other and we don't understand each other
You try to eat my mind but It's closed and I am sorry
I lie on the bed with my eyes open staring in emptyness or was I staring at my own soul
The phone, the emails, the writings, the words, the pain, the floods, the promises, fuck promises and fuck love
You swim and I swim, I sit alone and close my door, can you stop knocking, can you stop calling my name, analyze me analyze my shit analyze my positioning, understand me understand you understand everyone and who are you
Food, alcohol, water, sickness, headaches, slow down, speed up, can you cook for me? can you cut my hair? can you kiss me hug me and slap me?
I read I read and you want to read, I stand you follow, you are the lapdog, when I walk into the room everything disappears and melts and you follow
Empty minds, hollow souls, cutting food preparing food iron all the shirts, download useless crap, I read I read, I hide, I am lost and forgotten in the middle of the maze made of spirals and spirals and circles
Why is it wrong why because I am unhappy and sadness surrounds the laughing me I laugh my head off and tears come out messing up my mascara
My hands are dry and you smear sweet flowery lotion on my hands; my lips are chapped and you kiss me with slick lipgloss; I am sad I am sick you; cry for me; I scream and you give me honey with water; I hit my head on the wall and blackout while you hold me